Self-Identity and Ego

I used to study martial arts for about 7 years in my 20s.

I was consumed with the practice and philosophy, dedicating most of my free time of at least 3-5 hours a day to my practice. I learned a tremendous amount during that time and will forever be grateful of my study, especially the more esoteric and spiritual aspects of the art.

But one day I had a realization that hit me like the Zen teacher who hits the student when the student asks "what is Zen?"

I realized that I allowed the practice to become so much of my personality, and my identity (It was literally all consuming) that I was reinforcing my ego through the practice. The very tool that I was using to transcend ego, was inadvertently reinforcing the very thing inside of me.

That is how slippery ego truly is.

So what did I do? I immediately walked away from my study and practice. I threw that identity away.

Was it a drastic response?

Maybe, but sometimes the drastic changes are necessary to move forward in life.

The ultimate goal is let the attachments to the false self fall away. What is left is who you truly are.

-Jason 🙏