What Lies In The Shadow - A Guide On Shadow Work

Shadow work is a buzzword that has been tossed around in the spiritual community in recent years. The generalized sentiment behind the label is esoteric and has a broad meaning, as it’s usually not defined in a way that can be applied pragmatically. This seems to have caused a kind of mystery and confusion around the subject of shadow work and what it means. What I would like to do today is demystify the entire subject and offer some advice on it’s practical application.

The human condition has the propensity for all. In a dualistic perspective, from the most heinous act to the most loving act and everything in between. The purpose of shadow work is to integrate what you perceive yourself to “not be” along that spectrum. Shadow work will cater to your own ego. Each individual has their own personal shadow as well as the collective shadow that we all share. The collective shadow is the larger shadow of humanity as a whole, and can be summed up as the issues that humanity is dealing with. As we integrate our personal shadow, we affect the whole and thus contribute to the integration of the collective shadow.

So then, what is the shadow? Our shadow is the part(s) of us that we don’t want to identify, acknowledge, or accept as part of the self. It’s the parts of us that we may deem are wrong, unworthy, not moral, not right, etc. These labels that we place on the aspects of ourselves that we refuse to acknowledge and integrate can stem from unhealed trauma, societal conditioning, and/or culture or cultural influence.

The shadow may manifest or be expressed internally or externally. An unintegrated shadow can manifest as unconscious reactions or behaviors that are sabotaging or self-limiting. It can manifest as disease or pain in the body, or it can manifest as an inverted perspective of life. We tend to project, or act out, our unhealed shadow aspect externally when we are triggered by the various situations and people that life seems to throw at us. An example of an unintegrated shadow may be expressed by an individual who has suffered from a form of trauma carry around and act out that same unhealed trauma on others, doing unto others what has been “done” unto him. Another example may be the development of an internal disease, back pain, etc. due to unhealed emotions such as fear, rage, or sadness, etc.

Integration of the shadow is of prime importance for anyone on the spiritual path, anyone who seeks self-mastery. If our external life is a mirror of what is going on internally, then we will have numerous opportunities to identify and work with our shadow. As a matter of fact, we will continue to encounter situations that offer us an opportunity to integrate our shadow until we do it. The first step is recognizing and taking note of the the same patterns that appear in our lives. These patterns are our shadow being manifest and mirrored back to us. It’s as if a part of us (subconscious mind) is demanding our attention by causing the same patterns of events to occur over and over and again, until we have that “a ha!” moment. Once the recognition is there, the work can begin. The work can be uncomfortable, but with discomfort comes growth. Always remember that there is much wisdom and power in the darkness of our own shadow. And if the ultimate goal is self mastery, then we can never truly be masters of ourselves until we integrate our respective shadow.

So how do we work on integrating our shadow? Self-awareness, and honesty are two simple and powerful keys. Self-awareness is necessary to notice or identify a pattern of behavior, stuck emotions, fear, etc. and honesty is necessary in order to determine the root cause of the issue. Most issues can resolve when one is honest with oneself and strong enough to not let the issue exert any further control over oneself.

The concept of shadow integration is easiest described or understood when we discuss specific components that could make up a part of a someone’s shadow self. We are going to look at 2 common potential components, fear and trauma.

When dealing with fear, there is a step process that can be used. I want to specifically discuss existential fear. This type of fear usually revolves around making a choice to move out of your comfort zone, like a new career, starting a business, a new life path, moving away from friends and family, etc. Identifying the fear is the first step. The next step is to evaluate the fear. The idea here is to get to the bottom of the core issues, and how they may manifest physically. The final step is to look at the worst case scenario.

To offer an example, I will use the time I dealt with the fear of starting this business with Jaclyn.

Identify:

The fear I had when deciding to leave my job and move forward with this business was a fear of not having enough money, and a fear of the project failing or not being successful.

Evaluate:

How likely is the reality of failing? How do I define failure, or success? Are there action steps that can be taken to help push the project in the direction that I want?

WCS:

In my worst case scenario, I determined that I would be out of a job, and not earning money. However, at the time, there were certain plans that Jaclyn and I made regarding how we were planning on moving forward in life. We planned on starting a family and we didn’t want to put our children through daycare. We wanted to raise our children ourselves. Quitting my job ensured that one of us would always be around with our kids. We also made the financial arrangements to handle our future plans, and if the finances ever became a dire issue finding work wouldn’t be difficult for me since I am educated and have skills.

Once the fear is defined, evaluated, and the worst case scenario reviewed, we usually see that it’s not as bad as we thought it was and it doesn’t need to have a sometimes crippling effect on our lives, and can instead offer encouragement to try a new endeavor. This is a good practice to use when you want to evaluate how fear may be affecting certain decisions, or indecisions, in your life. Remember that not making a choice, is making a choice.

Trauma is also a big one with the shadow. This is where honesty plays a huge role. We all have trauma. A traumatic experience is any non-desirable experience that one has had that leaves a lasting impact on the person affecting future experiences. The first guideline that I want to establish is to not compare trauma. It’s not a competition. Don’t try to one-up someone with your more traumatic experience, or feel guilty that someone has had more trauma than you, so therefore you shouldn’t feel a certain way. People who live pretty good lives may feel guilty for thinking that they may have trauma. Trauma is a personal issue and experience. Trauma should be addressed if it is affecting you or your overall wellbeing. One thing to also remember is that the trauma is not who you are. Trauma is caused by an event(s) that occurred, and it doesn’t need to become part of your story or your identity. Some options that can be used when dealing with trauma is journaling, venting to an empathetic witness, forgiveness to either another or yourself, etc. The idea is to not feel shame or guilt for feeling a certain way. Once the trauma is identified, you can move forward with healing and integrating that aspect of your shadow. I remember hearing a saying once, “You are only as sick as your secrets.” It’s amazing how guilt and shame can drop off just by talking about it, accepting it, or working with it.

Shadow work is such an in-depth topic to review that an entire book could be devoted to the topic. The point of this article was to give a quick overview of what the shadow is, and how it can be integrated with some brief examples. Working with the shadow can be difficult, but it gets easier the more often you are willing to work with it. When you can be honest with yourself, and integrate the darkness to the light of the conscious mind, know that mastery is not far behind. This is the essence of true spiritual alchemy.

- Jason